Motherhood and Questioning Lines

To my dear Sister,

Your life is about to change as you are about to be a Mom.  As Kyle pointed out, really you have been a mom for months.  Just now the work will begin on the outside instead of only the inside.  Although that part of you will continue to grow and stretch for the rest of your life.  Perhaps Dr. Seuss explains the process best.  Just as the Grinch’s heart grew “3 sizes larger,” a mother’s does as well.  In fact, a large part of your heart will always be with your child.

In my eleven years of being a Mom, I have noticed that my life has now become characterized by questions.  Not just the “Why is the sky blue, Mommy?” ones from my kids.  But even more ponderings have come to my own heart.  And they began from the beginning.

Why is the baby crying?  Hungry?  Wet?  Bored?  Mad?  (And believe it or not, Sis, you will be the main one who will be right on this answer the majority of the time as you get to know your child!)

Should I really let them cry out?  Am I holding the baby too much? When will this baby sleep through the night? Have I done enough tummy time?

Is insisting on hand sanitizer okay?  (Yes!) Do I really want to take my baby out into the germy world?  (Sometimes).  Should I take the child to the doctor?  Should I wait to see if the baby just gets better?

These questions only multiply.

When should I start solid foods?  Have I been feeding too many sweet potatoes?  (Asks the mom with the previously orange faced children 🙂 ) Should I start potty training at 2?  When should we start preschool?  Where?

And now in my current stage of parenting.  Did I handle that situation okay?  Was I too lenient?  Too harsh?  Do I expect too much?  Am I doing too much for them?  Am I smothering?  Am I distant?  All of these questions really are the backbone to but one question.

Am I a good mom?

Possibly the most complex question ever.  Depending on the day, the hour or even the moment, the answer will vary.  Motherhood is full of milestones, second guesses, and even regrets.

But I want to assure you, my sweet sister, that God has chosen YOU as the perfect mother to your child.  Will you be the perfect mother?  No.  No mother can ever live up to that pinnacle.  And that is a good thing.

The biggest lessons I have learned during motherhood have resulted from those desperate moments when I am not holding it all together.  That is when my need of a Savior shines through.  My need for my husband.  My need for the support of family and friends.  The need for wisdom beyond myself.  As you take care of your dependent child, you begin to see just how needy you are.

I Peter 5:7 is often a verse I cling to.  “Casting all of your cares upon Him, for He cares for You.”  Your husband knows all about the importance of the perfect cast needed to catch anything.  I like the picture of throwing out for a lifeline.  God will respond because He cares. And oh, how He loves!

So, you can enter into this motherhood journey with confidence knowing you are not alone.  God is with you first and foremost.  And we will also be nearby – hopefully not with too much advice but more with listening ears and quick hugs.  I am looking forward to seeing you add mothering to your life.  And even more excited to meet this baby.  Soon!  I love you!

Thankful Mom

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